I think I’ve finally settled on my three words for 2010. Luckily, ‘timeliness’ isn’t one of them.
Proclaim – This is about committing to writing in many forms, whether that involves my writing projects, blogging, other social media, articles, writing letters to Congress, or anything else where I can speak what’s true to me and advocate about what’s important to me, particularly autism and children. And this is not just putting words on paper or screen; proclaiming is writing emphatically and ramming the exclamation point down into the table.
Connect – To personally connect with more parents, educators, therapists, specialists, technologists, and others who have similar experiences to mine and foster the relationships I’ve already made; to help people connect with each other so they can learn and get the information and support they need; and to connect people with quality online resources that help them become better parents, carers, educators, or therapists. This includes actually responding to my e-mail and our blog comments in anything resembling a timely fashion – which I’ve clearly and epically failed at for a long while now – as well as participating on others’ blogs.
Bamboo – This one requires a bit more explanation. Bamboo is – among other things – an important symbol in Zen Buddhism. It is very strong, flexible, supple, and resilient. It will bend under tremendous weight but not break and still be able to snap back to upright when the weight is gone. It responds exactly as it needs to under pressure, bending neither too much nor too little. It is the opposite of tension and rigidity. It has a profound ability to flex and adapt even to vast changes.
I wanted to find a simple word that for me captured the foundations for physical health, emotional health, and attitude. I think in order to be like bamboo you have to find ways to bring yourself more into balance, take care of yourself so your body can respond to things in the right way, practice a lifestyle that fosters calm, flexibility, and ease in the midst of great challenge and adversity, be open to opportunities and gifts that come from being a parent, and nurture a positive attitude about life.
Of course, if I manage even a fraction of any of that, I may try to cure cancer while I’m at it. 
But by trying to be more like bamboo, I think I’ll be a better father, husband, and friend.
One of the activities that pondering bamboo has led me toward is something I discovered called a ‘gratitude journal’. I at first thought of it as incredibly cheesy, but after doing it for just a couple of days I felt a noticeable change in my perspective. Being the geek that I am, I do this on my iPod Touch using an app – not surprisingly – called Gratitude Journal. (Link opens the App Store in iTunes – it’s 99 cents) Just open an entry, type some things that happened that day that you’re grateful for (shows up basically as bullet points), and you’re done. If you feel like it, you can rate your day 1-5 stars and drop a photo into it, though neither are required. It takes maybe two minutes, but I’ve found it a great addition to my day.
Have you decided on your three words for 2010 yet? Would love to hear them if you want to share!
Posts that hopefully are similar:
- Diagnosis Day – 2nd Anniversary Edition
- Where do parents of autistic kids in Holland go?
- What Blogging for a Year Has Taught Us
- Beginning to Rebuild
- Trying to Get Perspective
- Musings from the Weekend
- From the Way-Back Machine – Reflections on Father’s Day
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
I love bamboo. Just love it. What a wonderful image. Thank you.
And yes, gratitude journals are cheesy and yes, they are powerful.
Your blog is one of the things I am grateful for.
Okay, I absolutely love the Bamboo imagery, if I am Bamboo then I am just waiting for the day that the “pressure & weight” are gone and I ‘snap’ back upright again… that would be wonderful! I am still working on my words, but one of them would most definitely have to be ‘acceptance’… We took Reese to Starbucks tonight, and as I watched him twirl in circles over and over again, shaking his head back and forth while sticking his tongue out and garnering numerous stares… I realized that this problem isn’t going to go away.
I hate my first word.
I’m working on the other two…
Love the three words. These are the best I’ve seen anywhere! Bamboo is great for anyone, but perfect for parents of kids with autism. I may copy them, if that’s ok with you. Congrats!
Excellent choice of words. You have connected with 4 of us with this post.
Oh bamboo! What a wonderful symbol you’ve chosen Tim! The essence of what we all should strive for in our lives. Thank you for sharing this image with me (us!)
@Jay – I’m really liking my gratitude journal. It’s perfect for my attention span (takes two minutes), but I get a lot out of that little bit of time focusing on the good things going on. I’m certainly still well aware of all the challenges in our lives, but it’s been giving me a nice lift. And we’re thankful for you too!
@Kathy – ‘acceptance’ is an excellent choice. It was on my short list of choices. It was one of the goals I folded into ‘bamboo’. To respond to things in the ‘bamboo way’, we have to learn not to fight them, and to do that we have to accept that things are in this moment what they are.
That definitely doesn’t mean we don’t do anything to address them in whatever way is appropriate, but getting to where we can say “what is going on right now is part of who we are as a family and members within that family, and I accept that” seems like a real accomplishment.
‘Acceptance’ with respect to others’ differences is key for me this year, too. I really want to try to understand better where people are and try more to see things from their perspective, even if I strongly disagree with them or no matter how foreign their experience is to me. There are some truths that I think are inviolable that I will not yield on, but I think I should at least try to take some sort of time to understand where some people are coming from.
And as a t-shirt I have says, “Statistically speaking, you’re not normal either.”
Look forward to hearing your three words!
@HollyTW – By all means do! I’d be honored. Thanks!
@Barbara – Thanks for your affirming words and helping me see how my three are already working!
@Vicki – I’m tickled everyone is enjoying ‘bamboo’. Makes me know it was the right choice!