October 2009

The Sign for Brother

by Mary on October 29, 2009

As you may be aware, the J-man is in love with Rachel Coleman from Signing Time. In Love. We watch at least 5 DVDs per week, and depending on our ability to walk around/interact, maybe more. (Tim has been having serious back problems lately, and has actually had trouble walking.) The J-man does not actually sign, but he likes when we sign to him, and recognizes the signs. If we sign while Rachel is on, BONUS!

One day early this week, we were watching the show about the alphabet, and I was signing along with one hand, and the J-man came over to me and moved my other hand until I started signing with it as well. (This is harder than you would think!) After we had gone through the whole DVD, we started playing what I call the “Yes/No Game.” It’s surprisingly easy… the J-man comes up to me and says “yyyy” and I know he wants to play, so I say “Yes, yes, yes!” while nodding my head, and signing. Then he says “no, no, no” – and I say “No, No, No” while shaking my head, and signing. It works on taking turns, and the J-man thinks it’s hilarious. We go back and forth until I am slightly dizzy from shaking my head, and then I stop.

So yesterday, I was sitting in the man-cliner holding Dale Jr, and the J-man decided we should play the Yes/No Game. I was trying to sign while holding Dale Jr, and managed to get both hands going, when the J-man decided that not only should Mama sign, Dale Jr should sign too! He came over to us, and tried to position Dale Jr’s hands into the “no” sign each time we said “No” in our little game. Since Dale Jr absolutely adores the J-man, he laughed and laughed with each turn.

We’re probably far away from the actual ASL sign for “brother” but I think we have a good sign that “brother” is an awesome thing to be in the Flashlight family.

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A Blessing for the Day

by Tim on October 26, 2009

I heard this in an audiobook I was listening to while waiting to pick up the J-Man from school. An elementary school parking lot is not the most ideal place to get emotional, but I doubt anyone noticed, and who cares anyway.

It feels like it was written for parents like us. It’s beautiful, and it speaks volumes to me right now. Maybe it will do the same for you.

Hold on to what is good, even if it’s a handful of dirt.

Hold on to what you believe, even if it’s a tree which stands by itself.

Hold on to what you must do, even if it’s a long way from here.

Hold on to life, even when it’s easier letting go.

Hold on to my hand, even when I have gone away from you.

~ A Pueblo Blessing

 

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Not Dead Yet

by Tim on October 24, 2009

I know it’s been a long while since we posted something. For the most part, family life itself has been no more crazy than it usually is, but there are some areas in our lives that we know we need to make some changes in. The effort this is taking – and will continue to take for a while – has been exhausting. I think all this will result in our lives being much more like we want them to, but right now we’re just spent.

Sorry if this is a bit vague and cryptic. Nothing bad is happening, so don’t worry. It’s more that we’re making some significant lifestyle changes that will hopefully allow us to focus more on the kids, projects that are important to us, and autism advocacy both for the J-Man and for kids and parents everywhere.

I’m feeling very positive about what I think is going to come out of all this, and see this time more as growing pains than anything else. While the specifics of some of what we’re envisioning are still percolating, my excitement about it is keeping me moving forward through all the transitional stress.

We thank everyone for all of your thoughtful comments lately. We’ve been reading and enjoying them, though obviously we’ve been slack about responding. We appreciate each and every one of you and the comments you write! And we hope to catch up soon!

We should (hopefully) be resuming what passes for our normal programming in the very near future. Thanks!

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This is simply awesome. Kyle Forbes, you rock!

If video player messes up, look for “Autistic Cub Scout Saves Teacher’s Life”.

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[Note - If you don't live in the U.S., your only reason to care about this post is probably to satisfy your morbid curiosity about health insurance in our country. It's best that I stop here before I go into an uncontrollable rant about that...]

For a lot of us Americans, it’s that fun time of year when Fall arrives, the temperatures cool, in many areas the leaves turn, and we sit down to try to decipher what our health insurance ‘options’ are for the coming year. Around October is when many companies hold their annual period where employees can pick, among other things, their health insurance plan for the next calendar year. Whether it’s called “Open Enrollment”, the “Election Period” or some other dorky term, the idea is the same – except for birth, death, or marriage, you can only change your insurance plan once a year with your employer, and during this period is the time to do it.

[Note - One other exception is that when you start a new job that actually offers benefits, you can do all this then too, regardless of what time of year it falls.]

Assuming you have any choice at all, you’ll spend quite a bit of time trying to unravel what the various plans claim they’ll cover you for, all while knowing full well that you’re paying your premiums in the shaky hopes that they’ll pay any claims at all should you commit the sin of actually getting sick. [insert additional sarcasm here] Eventually you may end up just throwing a dart at the wall and picking whichever plan it lands on.

But usually buried down in all that benefits stuff is one gold nugget that every parent of an autistic child should very strongly consider getting – a flexible spending account.

[click to continue…]

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[coupon codes at the end of the post!]

If you read any of the “Who was born or what happened on my birthday?” sites, you may have noticed that October 9th may be one of the most boring dates there is. I really tried hard as a kid to find something worth getting excited about that happened on my birthday. You know, besides me being born.

Admittedly, John Lennon’s birthday was October 9th. OK, that works. But it’s some serious kind of steep drop-off to the next tier, which includes Scott Bakula and Zachery Ty Bryan (one of the kids on Home Improvement, don’t ask me which). No offense to either of them or any other October 9ers, but we don’t seem to be a noteworthy bunch. Apparently Cervantes (Don Quixote) was also born on my birthday, which I’ll admit isn’t bad. Then there’s Trent Lott, which is just plain wrong.

To take the “This Day in History” route, October 9 was one of the most boring days in history too apparently. Phantom of the Opera opening in London on this day is fairly OK. But then you get stuff like “Isaac Singer patented the sewing machine motor” and “Joshua C. Stoddard received a patent for his calliope.” Yay! The Calliope! And supposedly Leif Ericson discovered ‘Vinland’ (and lobsters and chowder I guess too) on this day around 1000, but I question how they even know that since they don’t even seem to know what Vinland is.

But then I recently discovered something that made me smile. As I’ve said before, there are a very few women in the J-Man’s pantheon of goddesses. In that tier right below Mary, there’s Laurie Berkner, his Pre-K teacher Mrs. Jennifer, and someone who I learned I happen to share a birthday with – our Blessed Lady of Signing Time, Rachel Coleman! Finally someone cool to share a birthday with!

Rachel has commented here a couple of times and I talked to her a bit by e-mail several months back. She has not only been an important of his life and our family’s life since he was a baby, she showed him extraordinary generosity by sending him an amazing package of gifts. And the work she and the rest of the Signing Time gang do for children of every ability is worthy of all the praise they get. She has set the October 9th standard very high, so the rest of us have some work to do. We’ll give John Lennon a pass, though.

In honor of our momentous day, I got some coupon codes from them via the Happy Birthday Rachel Celebration e-mail if you are looking to get some Signing Time DVDs. (OK, so the coupon code has nothing to do with my birthday.) It’s 35% off a single DVD for October 9 only (Promo Code – RACHEL35). There’s also a 10% off deal going on if you buy 3 or more DVDs until the end of the month (Promo Code – BUNDLE10).

The mathematically astute among you can take the fact that I am exactly one year older than Rachel and the number on the coupon code and deduce how old we both are. That’s as much as I’m telling, though the same astute people will also figure out that I’ll now be a ‘perfect square’, which seems only fitting…

[Disclaimer - Yes, those links above are affiliate links. Any proceeds that come in to us from them will go to an autism-related charity. We are huge fans of Signing Time and cannot recommend them enough. If you go straight to SigningTime.com and skip our links, that's great too. They deserve your business regardless of how you get there.]

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In Dreams Awake

October 4, 2009

“Our truest life is when we are in dreams awake.” – Henry David Thoreau “The dream was always running ahead of me. To catch up, to live for a moment in unison with it, that was the miracle.” – Anaïs Nin Today, a dream of mine became real. You know, those wonderful dreams you have [...]

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All the Good Things

October 2, 2009

My health has just been for crap lately, so crawling out from under my self-pity and general groaning – which I’m not good at in general – has required some serious conscious effort on my part. Thankfully, the J-Man has his ways of snapping me out of it with yet more astonishing new things he’s [...]

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