Some days start horribly and show no sign of improving. The day easily could prove to be a total write-off. Being one beat off the normal daily rhythm can send your kid into meltdown. Some days, your only real goal is to make sure everyone is alive when the day ends and that any damage to property isn’t permanent. The only way to salvage anything positive might be to find even the dumbest thing in your day that didn’t go wrong.
Here are five things you can do to ensure that your day has at least something like that in it. The sad thing is that each of these has actually happened to us. Like they say, rules exist because someone broke them - like the fact that you can’t mail yourself through the US Postal Service.
- Look down and make sure you are wearing something more over your behind than just underwear before you walk out to your mailbox. This is particularly positive if your mailbox is at the end of a driveway and you have a lot of neighbors.
- Speaking of underwear, when you pick up your clean undies from the laundry basket of clothes you didn’t put away, before you try putting a pair on, make sure the cat (or other animal in your house) hasn’t peed on them.
- Find some way to covertly figure out whether your child is still clothed before the laughing in your child’s room in the morning that may indicate that he stripped down and decided to stand up butt naked and pee all over the wall begins. Bonus points - If you install said device (say a video monitor), try not to aim the camera such that you might see something you’d really rather not, particularly at 6:30AM when you aren’t sure whether you woke up in the right house.
- Assuming your kid stayed clothed, if you go to pick them up in the morning or after a nap and they are wet, verify the nature of the wetness before proceeding. Remember, it is difficult to see colors in low light, and this is very valuable data to have.
- Don’t put the diaper cream you keep in the bathroom on your toothbrush. As a safety fallback, verify the nature of the substance on your toothbrush before putting it in your mouth.
Yeah, it’s a reach. But some days setting the bar incredibly low can help you feel like you accomplished something.
And you gotta admit that diaper cream doesn’t foam well on a toothbrush and putting on clean, dry underwear is better than the alternative.
Well, gotta go. My kid is laughing in his bedroom…
{ 3 comments… read them below or add one }
Please tell me the J-Man did not do #3.
(which seems to involve #1, but mercifually not #2 …
)
That should be MERCIFULLY……. yes I can type, really.
Let’s just say he was mooning the camera. The peeing on the wall thing was a while back, but the lunar sighting was yesterday and he had peed on the bed… along with the cat peeing on the laundry. All before 7AM…