I had a steady steam of tears watching it again. ESPN does such a great job with these triumph over impossible odds pieces they do. The second video just raises the pride people should have in him. He has taken a moment on the court and turned it into a cause. And by all accounts, he is doing great work in the world for autistic children, their families, and the institutions that support them.

Once again, J-Man has another role model to look up to as he gets older. And this wasn’t lost on us – the young man goes by J-Mac.

Go watch the videos. If you don’t weep, go get yourself checked out.

Video 1 – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=__JQcJ-wr0M

Video 2 – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sE_pwpBmG3w

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=granderson/080717&lpos=spotlight&lid=tab5pos2

I’ve also found that our rapport with various people largely is directly proportional to how close they are to the ‘front lines’ of working with kids on a daily basis. That seems consistent with others we’ve talked to. Administration just requires a different way of approaching problems than teaching or providing services like therapies. That doesn’t make one more or less right than the other, and it doesn’t remotely mean that there’s something wrong with people in administration. Most of them are professional, helpful, high-quality people. There’s just a reality to how the bureaucracy works.

When you mix parties who have very different perspectives and interests (budgets, compliance with the law, teaching in the classroom or providing therapy to kids all day, instincts to fight mortal combat for your kid’s education, etc.), there will naturally be tensions. It doesn’t help that schools are about the last things to get funding come budget time.

All these are things I can understand, even if I don’t like it, but it’s the butt-coverers that I don’t tolerate. We’re already seen a bit of that. Defensiveness doesn’t really have a place here, because all that tells me is that the defensive person is far more interested in themselves than my kid. I don’t care about handing out blame, I just care about getting it right.

I read “How to Win Friends and Influence People” by Dale Carnegie again recently and think it would be immensely helpful to people to read it before an IEP meeting. Some of it feels a bit naive in a modern context, but there are a lot of helpful tips on how to take the high road and still get what you want. Some advice is timeless.

Maybe we need a “when your IEP process goes south” post. I think a lot of people want to have a positive attitude, but there are so many things that can go wrong and there’s so much at stake. There’s a lot of fear in all this, too, particularly fear of not knowing the right things to do to make sure you get what your child needs. At least that’s how I often feel. It’s hard to be positive and fearful at the same time, but I think it is possible.

Thanks for your insights. They’re incredibly valuable to us.