Three letters that change your life

by Tim on March 20, 2008

We have a diagnosis – ASD.

As our readers know, we had the J-Man’s autism evaluation yesterday and the doctor didn’t even need to score the evaluation to tell us that the J-Man has an autism spectrum disorder (ASD).

That spectrum includes a wide and diverse range of things so the more exact diagnosis won’t be clear until we get the full write-up back in three weeks. Given the discussion at the end of our appointment, it appears that we’re looking at something significant. Either way, the wait is pretty much over.

I want to believe it’s inaccurate, but the rational part of me knows it’s correct. I know I’ve been in denial for a while. I didn’t want to believe it, and I still don’t. He didn’t much care for the evaluation, but I thought it was still a fair snapshot of where he is right now. I have enough confidence in the doctor to believe his assessment is medically valid.

We’re not really in the right mental place to talk about this yet. At one level, nothing is any different than Tuesday. He’s still the same, wonderful, beautiful, life-filled, wondrous boy he’s always been.

The reality is that the road ahead looks a lot more uncertain. Yesterday was a very bad day. I went to Barnes and Noble this morning to do what I do to cope with things like this – I bought books about autism. I sat at the reading tables and looked through them. It was all I could do to not start crying again. And I do mean again.

That said, I know we will be fine. We just need to process this for a little while.

To all those who have supported us and continue to do so, we love you.

That’s all for now. More to come.

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